What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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I have tuberculosis because Ebola is too mainstream.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

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I don't know which one is emptier my bank account or my love life

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Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

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A bald man walks out a bar crying Prostate cancer

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

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What did the tuna say to the fan I LIKE YOUR STOOL AHAHHAHAHHAHAH

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Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

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Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

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a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

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want to hear a funny joke? what a coincidence so do I!

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WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your Fallopian tubes ripped out by wolverine

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why don't lesbians use dildoes? Because they look just like a big penises.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being in an abusive relationship.

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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