whats got two legs and cant walk a paraplegic

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Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

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How do you kill Helen Keller? With a gun.

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A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

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What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

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What did the boy say when be landed in the bottom of the well, nothing he was dead.

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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what do u call a guy with 4 nipples? Hairy Styles

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops