What did Petunia say to the other Petunia Hi there Petunia

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How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

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Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

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How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

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What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

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Ants are the Velociraptors of the insect world.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

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What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

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Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

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A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

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Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

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ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

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Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

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There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

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What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. He was stapled to the baby.

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Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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