Why was the man sad? His wife left

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an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

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When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

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Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

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Can midgets still have big dreams?

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What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

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A Duck walks into a bar.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo. Boo Who? Boobies.

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Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "why the long face?" The horse replies, "I am Sarah Jessica Parker."

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

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That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cancer

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How to you confuse an Alzheimer's patient? Present her with a complicated nuclear physics problem.

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

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What do you get when you put your dick in a potato? A guy who is into creepy sex

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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