Yo mama's so fat, she weighs 283 pounds.

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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How do you tell the difference between a politician and a reindeer? A politician is an employee who works under a strict firm of a government department while a reindeer is a large, grazing ungulate in the family Cervidae that is native to subarctic polar regions of North America.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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What's the best part of any family reunion? Sodomy.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A little boy who can't reach the doorbell.

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Friend's sister: how many seconds are in 12 o'clock Friend: alot Friend's sister: WELL THEN 12 O'CLOCK IS A REWERJAJSBDKDJDHRJRJFHFKRJRIDBDKSBSDJ *slams door*

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

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Q: How do you count the population of Mexico? A: Take a census.

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whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

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EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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knok knok whos there know one cares your gay

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Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

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I was having sex with thisgirl and now I'm going to be a dad. All because I didn't wear a condom

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

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You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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