Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

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What did the caninibol do when he duped his girlfriend He wiped

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If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

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How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

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How do you end a sentence

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

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Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

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What has two legs? Half a cat

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm What is worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding chuck norris Whats worse than finding your girlfriend has a bigger Slong than you? Getting raped with a cheese grater. Whats worse than all of these? Being black Sadly im black :( -Jordan M

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So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

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Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

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Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

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Q: What do you call justin bieber? A: gay

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Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette have a contest to see who can get the most likes on their profile pictures. They are all attention-whores.

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Friend's sister: how many seconds are in 12 o'clock Friend: alot Friend's sister: WELL THEN 12 O'CLOCK IS A REWERJAJSBDKDJDHRJRJFHFKRJRIDBDKSBSDJ *slams door*

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Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

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Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

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A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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