Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man and a midget walk into a bar each carrying a suitcase. They were stopping by after work.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a chicken who crosses a road? Nothing, its still a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A horse enter a bar, and the barman says: "why the long face?" The horse has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the person get hit by a fridge? They didn't for its physically impossible for most people to throw a normal sized refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A blonde was told to go to the into the nearby swimming pool and sniff the Scratch-and-Sniff sticker on the bottom. Once at the bottom, she quickly realized that it was not a good idea and swam back to the surface.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A homosexual walked into a bar. He orders a beer. When he holds out his credit card, the bartender says, "We do not accept credit." Upon hearing this, the homosexual reaches into his wallet and pulls out five dollars. Because it is legal tender, the bartender takes the money and gives the homosexual the change that is due. The homosexual proceeds to drink the beer. When he is finished, he walks out of the bar. Nobody is aware of his sexual orientation.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Depending on the amount of saliva you produce each lick the answer to this question varies species to species.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

hey fat ass u want some butter with them rolls?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's big and grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red violets are blue I don't know you so get away from me.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A white man/women works behing the counter at a 7/11

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A vampire sees a werewolf at a bar, aware of the upcoming brawl between them two, the bartender shoots them both in the head but it's okay because neither of them exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's better than winning the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops