knock knock who's there your moms dead im sorry

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Justin Beiber

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bicycle.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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Why did the Michael lose the race? Because he had no legs.

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

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A muslim, a jew, and a black man jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? They all hit the ground at the same time because gravity pulls all objects at the same rate regardless of their mass.

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what's black, white, and red all over? a penguin stuck in a blending machine

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What do you call a doctor without a head? Deceased

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

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What caused the man to become blind? He took an arrow to the knee.

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What is both bold and brash? Fox

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So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm allergic to both Now I'm dead

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Ms Leong Sux

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alexis. Hi, come in!

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just got AIDS, And soon so will you!

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How do you kill a deer? You don't, you just let it be because that's what a decent human being would do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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