What did the pirate order for breakfast? Pancakes.

We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

Knock knock. Who's there? Cher. Cher who? Just Cher.

What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

What do you call it? Whatever it is.

A rabbi and priest both go into a bar... and they each had a responsible number of drinks before walking home.

Q: what did the poor, blind, deaf, orphan girl get for Christmas? A: cancer.

Yo Momma so fat, that the doctor prescribed her prescription drugs that deal with her eating disorder and recommended that she begin a low calorie diet and live a more active lifestyle.

what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

Whats sorer than stubbing your toe? Stubbing your toe twice

What happens when you put a baby, a dog and a cat in the same bag They will all most likely suffocate if left in the bag too long

Q. Why did the 8 year girl scream and cry when she was raped? A. I have no idea either. I drugged her and taped her mouth closed.

Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

How do catch Lady GaGa's attention? Have a Bad Romance

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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