How did the blonde die? She got swallowed whole by a 1,000-foot scorpion.

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What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to take three harpoons to the chest and still manage to feast on a family of baby seals...... Hi my name is Joey

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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what goes in hard and comes out soft? bubblegum, what were you thinking?

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How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

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knock knock who's there Romney Romney Who? RON PAUL 2012

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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whats red and smells like cherries red cherries

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Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

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How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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Fathers Day at Tyrone's house.

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What did little John get for his birthday? No sort of disease or illness of any kind because he was in perfect health. He also got an Xbox.

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Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

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In 1843 when Man invented the moon, people set sail on ironclad ships to lands that sold items that weren't for sale in similar such stores in other lands not reachable by ironclad ships or dirigibles as they became known once they changed form completely and were a differentobject entirely and of no use for water transport. That's when the real revolution in telecommunications began, the truck drivers would use CB radios as early as 1287 and 1276 in Canada. the CB radio enabled the users to order pizza and develop symbiotic relationshiops with canvas. Amongst other things.

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How many blondes did it take to screw in the lightbulb? Just one. She did a fine job.

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A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

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Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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