Q: What do you call a dog with metal balls and two-inch legs? A: Animatronic

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

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What happens when u poke a ghost that is standing on the edge of a building? Ghost aren't real so therefor u will fall of the edge and die

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

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What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

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What's a foot long and slippery? A slipper.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

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Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

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A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

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Have you seen the clown hiding from gay people at walmart?

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Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

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What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

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If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

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Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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