Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Guess what my dog can do? Bark.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road? To End His Suffering On The Farm. Suicidal Mission.... Complete

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

thumb_up thumb_down -12

So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what smells like red paint, but tastes blue? my heroine OD panflets

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

thumb_up thumb_down -12

that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

thumb_up thumb_down -12

If it looks like grass, smells like grass, and tastes like grass... Then you were honestly misled when ordering that salad.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs? He was shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many black babies fit in a garbage can? It depends on the capacity of the garbage can.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your mom is so fat that she has high cholesterol. Moral: I AM NOT CRAZY! Said the man to the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you smoke, the blacker your lungs get.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

There were three men named manner, poop, and shut up. they all were mad fun of in middle school and ended up hating their parents for giving them such retarded names.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Three blind mice go into a pub, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Jenny cry? Because everyday Jenny is bullied. Jenny cried for this reason, but nothing happened. The bully still bullies her today.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

It was a beautiful day, John was driving in his car down the street, Kameron was riding his bike preparing for a bike race the following day, and Griffin was having his 7th birthday party. John ran over Kameron and Griffin, he killed Griffin and broke Kameron's legs to where he could never stand/ride again

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I love results day! for every A* I get 30 pounds! everything else I cut myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

kill yourself....with a cigarette

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why does the chicken cross the road? 4

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the boy without arms get in his Christmas present? A pair of gloves. Just kidding, he didn't open it yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops