A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

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You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

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Women deserve equal rights.

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Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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How many baby's does it to paint a wall red? It depends how many you throw.

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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Why couldn't anybody at school taste lunch? Nobody made lunch.

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

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Why did? Yes

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

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What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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