Your momma so fat that she went to the doctor and he told he to cut down on the junk food because she weighs more than the average human being

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Q. I'm not hot, I'm not cold I'm not young, I'm not old I'm not lame, I'm not cool I'm not smart, and I'm not a fool. What am I? A. Text

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My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

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Has u seen my grammar?

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What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

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Guess what! What? huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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Jimmy can't drive the tractor. Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he's a patato

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why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

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Q: What do you call a blonde, a brunette, and a red head all who are 16 years old and standing in a school? A: High School Students

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Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

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what's worse than 24? 6 million.

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what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

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Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

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Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for the cases when you die...then you are dead.

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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What do you call two gays with small dicks? Trace and Jacob

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten won the contest. The man didn't think much of it.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

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Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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