What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

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So two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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Whats better then having 10 fingers Having 11

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Knock Knock whos there? Semore Frickelson Semore Frickelson Who? What other Semore Frickelson do you know!? Let me in its freezing out here!

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What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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Why did humpty dumpty have a great fall? He was committing suicide.

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Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

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What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

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roses are red, violets are blue, penis

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

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Hickory dickory dock. Two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one; The other escaped with minor injuries.

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How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

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After eating dinner, my dad said... "That was really good."

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A Hispanic walks into an alleyway and sees two of his rich friends. He desperately needs money and only has enough time to shoot one of them because he sees the police following him. He decides which one to shoot... Wait, if he has enough time to think about this shouldn't he just shoot both of them?

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P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

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Photons have mass? i didn't even know they were catholic.

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops