Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

Q: What's purple and flies? A: Super Grape

How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

 

How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

what is blue and fuzzy? Blue Fuzz

i hate non minorities!

What's similar about a fish and an eagle? They can both fly, except for the fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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