What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC.

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silver bullet?

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What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

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What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

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Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

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a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

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What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

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What's worse than having a mouth full of molars? A pole through your chest.

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What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

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Niall Horan

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What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

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So i broke up with my girl, here her number... SIKE!! ITS THE WRONG NUMBAHHH!!!

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Why didn't the Country club waiter enjoy iced tea? He's simply always had a preference for warm beverages. He assumes this goes back to his infant days when his mother would massage his belly with warm porridge.

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Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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