It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

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What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

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How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

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A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

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what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

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I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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what did the ox say to his son when he left for collage? bison

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Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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Q. Whats does the kid and the dog have in common? A. The kid has Herpes.

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What's worse than finding out your dad has AIDS? Finding out your little brother also has it, but you and your mother don't.

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Q: What did the shark say while eating the surfer A: Nothing, his mouth was full, and besides....sharks cannot talk.

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Guess Penn State Is Holding Jerry Sandusky Day this Saturday against Nebraska. All Kids 10 and Under get in Free...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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