What do we call Osama? Osama

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Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

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How many Mexicans can you fit in a Smart car? None. It's too damn small!

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Three baby seals walk into a club...

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting eaten alive by midgets with down syndrome

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What did the dog say when the tiger bit him? Nothing. Dogs don't talk.

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Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

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what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

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What do you call a man with no arms an no legs in the ocean? Bob What do you call the same man on your front porch? Matt What do you call the same man on your wall? Art

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

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Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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Why did the Jewish population diminish in the '40s? Showers and Ovens

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Why did the money due? Because it fell out of the tree

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What's white and black? Color blind.

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Kindness is what makes the world go round..... and chocolate.

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Did you just admit being considerate? I do not care about who gets the last comment anymore, I need to tear my face away from the screen ASAP.

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Hey, you are competitive, but let me have the last word here and you will like it. If you keep poking your nose constantly, the effect will actually overlap, making it stronger and stronger, by all means though, make sure you keep some nose working alright?

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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My favorite color is Ham. And I can count to Potato.

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Q: Why did'n the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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