whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I stole your wallet and used to buy a prostitute. I had a great time. What was the question again?

The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

What do you call a blonde with great maths skills? A smart person with blonde hair.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Whats the sad thing about 4 black guys going over a cliff in a car? It was my car!

You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

What do you call two black people on one bike? Unsafe. Regular bicycles are typically not suited for use by two people at once, black or otherwise. Riding on the handlebars is dangerous and can lead to serious injury.

how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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