What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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This is amazing! Visit http://psncodesonlinefree.com - you receive free PSN Card Codes instantly! Everybody uses this now!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What would George Washington be doing if he was alive today? Scratching and screaming at the bottom of his coffin.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why the fuck he crossed the road, I don't know what he is thinking.

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Whats brown and drives people around? A cab driver of south asian decent. Finding a job that alligns with their qualifications and experience is not always possible, so they take up menial jobs to survive and provide for their family.

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To men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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What did the black police officer say to the white police officer? We just got a call in. Four dead children were found in an alley behind a mall.

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What's did the white man say to the black man? Howdy.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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rose's are red violets are blue bernard is mine and yours too if you hurt him in any way i'll punch you in your face and make you gay Krissc

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Why did the blonde make pasta even though she had a gluten allergy? She had some Italian friends coming over. Also she bought some gluten-free pasta and sauce so she wouldn't need to be hospitalized.

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A few people were put in a room with 5 doors and 4 were a certain death one was freedom and they had to choose a door to go in not knowing which was freedom the first person went in the door on the far left. He got raped by Michael Jackson. The second guy opened the door on the far right. He got in a room entirely made of ice cream. He ate all of it and got such a brain freeze his brain froze. The third and final guy turned around and noticed a door labeled exit. He exited the room and continued his life as a normal person

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When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? there are more birds on that side

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You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops