A stoner walks into a bar. A few minutes later he is asked to leave by the bartender because he is disruptive and uncoordinated. The stoner leaves because conflict is not in his nature.

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Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

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Why do women like NASCAR? They don't.

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Q: What's a crutch's favorite song? A: Lean on me

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Why was the woman sad on her 21st birthday? Because she was born on September 11,1980

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

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DON'T LOOK A GIFT HORSE IN THE MOUTH BECAUSE HORSES HAVE BAD BREATH

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

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Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

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how do you make a baby float? you take your foot off its head

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why was the man so good at holding stuff? he was born with 4 arms!

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What did the pepperoni say to the pepper We are both tacos

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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What do you call a black woman in a pool? Drowning.

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Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

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A white man/women works behing the counter at a 7/11

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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Knock knock. Who's there? FedEx. FedEx who? Just kidding, it's hookers.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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