Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

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Whats worst than being stuck in a cage with one blonde? Being stuck in a cage with four blondes.

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You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

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Who is married to Uncle Joke? Antijoke.

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I like cheese. You like cheese. Have a nice day.

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You know what's cool? Yep.

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Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

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Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

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Did you hear about the man who lost his right arm and left leg... He's ok now he's all right.

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What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

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What is a black, yellow like liquid that contains carbon dioxide, usually kept in a can, and is not coke? Pepsi.

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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Whats yello and cant swim A bus full of dead children in a lake

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Q: Whats the deifference between me and you A: The fact that im the beautiful one -RDV

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how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

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Why did the pedophile skip breakfast? He said that he would grab a little something on the way to work...

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I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

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the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Boy: Excuse me, do you have a cigarette? Man: First let me see your ID. Boy: I don't have an ID Man: Well, how much money do you have? Boy: 50 cents Man: Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes. Boy: Good job, I'm actually undercover cop and you sir are a good citizen for not giving a minor cigarettes. Man: Cool, do I get a reward? Boy: Yes, you will receive a good citizen award and free $50 coupon. Man: Thank you! Boy: Can I have a cigarette now? Man: I wasn't lying when I said I didn't have any cigarettes. Boy: Okay, have a nice day.

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11/9 Americans won't get this joke.

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How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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