What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

what do all black jokes start with (look left look right)

Why was the boy so tired? He had to carry his moms dead body up the stairs.

What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

Nowadays, aviation is the most secure means of conveyance in the world, but paragliding is not.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

Why did Sally cross the road? Because a rapist was chasing her

Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

stfu Aodhan u and kevin are doin all the instigsating

What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

Joker: Why so serious Man: My mom and dad just got hit by a car, and you just stabbed my friend in the face with a pencil. Joker: Oh well im sorry to hear that.

Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

Why did the man cut his hair? Cause he has cancer

Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

What did grandma get little Benjamin for Christmas? Nothing, she died last year

how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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