What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

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Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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they told me not to write here but i did

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

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One time i was sitting down

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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Why did the blind man laugh at the book. He didn't

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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