Q-what did lady gaga say to the retard when he asked why he's so stupid? A- Cuz baby u were born this way

Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

hey bruno ta quoi ds ta boite a lunch aujourdhui? DU SABLE CRISS DE POVRE!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Doctor Harold Boo, I was your grandmother's primary caregiver, I'm here to inform you that she died of a massive heart attack.

u NoT mY dAd HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

there once was a chicken it was yellow

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

You want to hear a joke? Republican

In Soviet Russia, Joseph Stalin killed a lot of people and there was nothing funny about it.

It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Me too.

Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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