Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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What do you call someone who sits on anti joke every day? Luke Skywalker

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You walk by a boy and see he is playing with poop. You ask the boy what are you doing? He says I'm building a office. You ask him why he says "because I don't have shit to make a building"

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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it was christmas and the kid waited all night. finally santa came.....

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What is black, white, and red all over? something that just so happens to be seen by the color blind.

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Humans and dolphins are the only species who have sex also for enjoyment.

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What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

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among liedbtt is my Captcha code

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? Getting shot in the gut What's worse than that? Getting raped in the hole made by the bullet

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I slept through the Dark Knight movie....turns out I was pretty tired.

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Q: What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's Jewish.

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What is worse than menopause? Falling down the stairs breaking your next....

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What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

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Q: What happened when the rich man got married? A:His wife stole everything he had and left him a cold and broken man.

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dont be afraid of lard squeezing cause really its just me teasing

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What is spiky and opens up wide? The Mouth…what were you thinking you perv?

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What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Finding a half-eaten worm in your apple.

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My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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