A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

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What do you call a bunch black people falling off a cliff? A mudslide! What do you call a bunch of white people falling off a cliff? An avalanch!

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You just sunk my battleship! 5,000 people just perished at the bottom the ocean in a war for pointless political reasons.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Lemons are yellow

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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What did one traffic light say to the other? Nothing, as traffic lights are incapable of thought as they are not living.

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Why was Billy unhappy? He was molested by a black guy.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Gestapo.

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Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

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A Jew, Catholic, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The Jew leaves first for an unrelated reason.

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Knock Knock Who's there? UPS you have a package from Amazon. \ Oh, Thanks, where do I sign? Right here. Ok, thanks, have a nice day. Thanks you too.

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a boy walks into a hospital ward, and procedes to break down into tears because his family died

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How many polish people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. The polish are a civilized and prosperous country.

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How do you kill a diabetic? Take away their insuline

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Why did the white guy sit on the toilet? So he could take a poop.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

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Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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