What's a ghost's favorite color? Usually whatever their favorite color was in life.

roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

What did the dyslexic boy get for Christmas? A laptop. And he was very happy.

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

A black person tans and starts to peel, what do you get? A white person.

why did the roof cave in? It was not structurally sound do to poor architecture

What's the reason my dog died? I ate him.

What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

Laughter is the best medicine. Not for cancer.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock. Knock Knock Who? Knock Knock (:

Pineapple.

What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

why did sally fall off the swing cause she had no arms knock knock who's there? not sally

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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