A man removed Stephen Hawkings hand off his keyboard, what did Stephen say to the man? Nothing his hand isnt on the keyboard.

what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

Hurricane Sandy should be named A-Rod. Cuz he dosent hit anything

Why did the girl kill herself? she was depressed.

Eating food: Ugh disgusting! Taking a dump later: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Man, you are doing it wrong... Waterworld was a pretty dry movie, I mean when are they gonna start making movies with a bit of wet humor for a change? SERIOUSLY BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I AM NOT SERIOUS!

Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a PS3? Michael was a succesful dancer, singer-songwriter, musician, and philanthropist, whereas a PS3 is a games console.

Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

penis

what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

What did Hitler say to the black jew? Get to the back of the oven

Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

Paul walks on a bridge. It collapses.

Why did the clam not like to share? The deep sea is a competitive environment, where survival of the fittest is prominent.

Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

I would very much love to meet you again Erron, call me sometime I do not care how you get my number.

Whats a hobbo's favorite food? Trash

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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