A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it's in a chicken coop.

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Whats an Anti-joke?? A joke that possesses the kind of humor based on the surprise factor of absence of an expected joke or of a punch line in a narration which is set up as a joke.

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What's orange and not an orange? An orange.

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Q. What did the man say when he beat his video game? A. "I beat my video game." Q. What did the man say after his favorite sports team missed the playoffs? A. "My favorite sports team missed the playoffs." Q. What did the man say when a murderer was in his house? A. Nothing. He was dead.

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What did the electron do after losing his proton? Trough electromagnetical forces, the electron simply left it's atom, making it become a positive ion. Then, atracted by other atom's magnetical force, it joins the other atom's last vallence shell, creating a negative ion, since there are more electrons then protons in the atom in issue.

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If Apple made a house, would it have Windows?

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

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A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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So there's a man named Moses. He prays to God for a donkey to transport him from Bethlahem to Jerusalem. God granted his wish. God said" To make the donkey go, you must say Hallelujah. To make it stop you say Go". Moses rode off happily. Suddenly the donkey went off trail and was headed towards a steep cliff. Moses kept saying stop, stop, stop. He remembered what God had said, and had said Go. They stopped one inch before falling down. Moses thanked the lord and said " Thank You Jesus, Hallelujah." And down they went.

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Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q- what do you call a Jew swimming in the Antarctic? A- Dead, any man wouldn't survive swimming in water that cold

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

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How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farm was sold and he had no other place to go.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

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why couldn't three people walk? they were a part of the human centipede.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe

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a group of jews went to a factory to apply for jobs. Only one came out.

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Why was the guy stupid? 'Cause he was!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops