My favorite word starts with F and ends with U-C-K! My favorite word is FIRETRUCK! What'd you think I'd say? My favorite thing starts with P and ends with O-R-N! My favorite thing is POPCORN! What'd you think I'd say?

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A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

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There was a dog and a cat. What happens next? The cat's not there anymore. Neither is the dog. Can you guess what happend? The dog ate the cat, but the cat was his friend, so the dog committed suicide.

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Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

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Why was Johnny so mad at his father? Because his father had a constant drinking problem and was very abusive.

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A White guy invites his Black friends into his house, he says "Make yourself at home." THEY DO

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What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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What's red and a cow? Red cow

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Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

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Johnny had 100 chocolate bars. He ate 95 and gave 3 to his friend. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

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Why did the little boy didn't finish his dinner? He died.

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What is a jew in space? Dead

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Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

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What fires shots? A gun

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

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Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

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A white man walks into an elementary school. He was the teacher.

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What happened when the Mexican put the Popsicles in the fridge? They melted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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