- Anti Joke

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

A guy gets murdered, because of the Reco act the whole gang he belongs to goes to jail as well. They cry in their beds

Potassium? K.

Do you know what the zombie said? Raaargh Brains

A black person tans and starts to peel, what do you get? A white person.

What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

Well Nero, my actual name is Axel Knight, I might have used your "moralman" identity as my own social experiment of sorts, I mean no offense, and if you will leave some contact information, I am sure we can arrive to some kind of settlement... ...Keep your identity crisis thing, I have absolutely no reason to continue communicating here, besides, its six million followers, actually more like seven...

Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

Q:Why was the frog sad A:He was stapeld to a boys face.

what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

- How breakdance was invented? - A certain black man was trying to stole rims from moving car.

good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

Roses are red violets are blue your mother is pretty what happened to you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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