Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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A boy wakes up in the morning and says i"'m feeling kind of fishy today," the boy's dad walks in and relpies "that's because you are a fish."

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

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So a guy with a machine gun walks into a bank, makes a deposite and leaves.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette have a contest to see who can get the most likes on their profile pictures. They are all attention-whores.

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4 gay men walk into a bar,but there is only one stool..... What do they do? Turn it over

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

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Why couldn't little Jeffy find his way to gumdrop palace? Because he was shot

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What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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Why was the American patriot sad that Bin-Laden was killed? Because he wanted to take him back to America to touture him.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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A horse walks into a bar. Realizing the severity of the situation, the bartender heads toward the exit... stumbling over a chair.

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what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

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Q: Why do sharks live in salt water A: Because if they don't the die from blood loss because their blood-cells swell up and explode in non- salty water.

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whats funny about a jew burning? Nothing......

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what did the bug say when it got ran over by a car? NOTHING, bugs can't talk

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Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

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Fun Fact: If you lay out all of the veins in your body out, You will die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops