A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwing out all the W&Ws

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a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. the mexican because he had to clean it first.

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When life gives you lemons, you should be wondering how "life" managed to give you those lemons.

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why do german shower have eleven holes? jews have 10 fingers

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LOL

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wetly sucks dick just like teh boowb

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

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Knock knock Who's there Evan Evan who Evans erectile area is largo with Sarah plains pudding

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

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I want to make a lamp shade out of your skin, because you light up my life.

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A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

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What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

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A blonde, brunette, brown walk into a hair salon. They then proceed to each get they're own procedures done then leave not having any contact with each other.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

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Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

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Hello penis

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I like my women like I like my coffee... 2 cream 1 sugar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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