How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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one time when i bought a sonic blast they gave me a regular? size spoon and i was like this is a huge inconvenience.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, you are my slave, get back to work!

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The word "Walter" is never funny.

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? To test the principles of gravity.

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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Jims family is having a picnic. Jim goes and gets his food. shortly after he drops his food. Jim is really sad and goes and gets more food. Jim is black

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Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you didn't know that, go back to school.

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LeBron in the fourth quarter

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Why is this website called anti joke.com? Because it has anti jokes.

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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So there was once this cool little dude that had a purple nose. People would walk by on the streets and say, "Hey! That's a cool nose!" Purple nose man appreciated that they didn't pretend it wasn't there, and instead celebrated the diversity. The next day, he was scalped.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

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Why didn't LeBron James go to college? Because the opportunity to secure millions of dollars in salary straight out of high school was too lucrative for him to pass up.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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irish man drinking john smiths

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Wanna hear a joke? Fifa price ranges.....:(

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What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

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A muslim walks into a gun shop

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What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

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What do you call a Mexican on the moon? Quite an unusual circumstance consedering Mexico doesn't currently have a space program. Not only that but Nasa hasen't even had people going to the moon since the 1970s.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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