What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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What is 33 + 1? Penis

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Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

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why is the earth mad at the moon? cause the moon mooned the earth

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Does it really matter?

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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What do you call a man who eats another man? An man eater.

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Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

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What african eat for christmas Sand.

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A tiger walks into bar. He orders a drink and leaves. The tiger's name was Tony the tiger," It was just a man wearing a costume for the cereal company.

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To commit suicide thus getting to the other side(hell/heaven)

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

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What did one lion say to the other lion? Nothing. There was no other lion. This particular lion had horrible social anxiety so he spent most of his time alone, eating buffalo poop and playing World of Warcraft thus further alienating himself from the other lions. He was a very lonely lion.

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What do you do If you can't afford a hair cut? Don't get one.

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Why didn't the blonde get into college? She died in a car crash.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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