What do you call a black man who has been killed? A dead person.

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there was a Black and Mexican in a car who was driving? the cop

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While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

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I went to the doctor and explained to him, "My penis fell off." The doctor gives me an odd look, and then chops his off to make me feel better.

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The tall man says; How's theweather downn there? he's talking to smurf

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A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

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Where do you find a quadriplegic? Where you left him

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Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

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Why are they called waiters? Because you got to wait for them for a fucking long time. Why do they call you a patient. Just so you wont get impatient, if you do you are no longer a patient and they will ignore you.

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Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

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why couldn't the man open the window? he had no hands due to his time serving the USA in vietnam

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

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two snow men standing in a field and one says to the other can you smell carrots

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Totsie Roll totsie pop? Altough many tests have been done, there still isn't a certain number. There are many variables involved with this question.

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why does paul mccartney not wear shoes? cause a nigga stole it

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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