Women deserve equal rights.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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what did the bug say when it got ran over by a car? NOTHING, bugs can't talk

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Multiple complications including broken bones, a fractured skull, liver disease, and the fact that all his family had been gassed by the Nazis.

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What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

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Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having a Hippo give you head.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

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Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

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how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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Knock knock Who's There? Woo? Woo who? Stop celebrating and let me in.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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When is Florida not the sunshine state? At night.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can do whatever the hell it wants

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How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops