Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

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hextech crafting too opieop

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A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Q: If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it still make a sound? A: Yes

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Not lying Red, I have my contacts, I am a "facilitator", I pull strings for my employers, and sure the FBI has me on their files, after all we have cooperated with them. Not because I wanted to, but because its my job, and it helps me use the best of my abilities and limited education (I am technically an educated lawyer, and not an agent).

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What is funnier then a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown!

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

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What do a black man and a cop have in common? They are both not cabbages.

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A blind man cant see this joke, so I probably shouldnt write it..

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

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What do you call a camel with three humps? A deformed bactrian

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Up High. *high fives* In The Middle *high fives* Down Low *high fives* In the Grass *high fives* You've been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

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You just sunk my battleship! 5,000 people just perished at the bottom the ocean in a war for pointless political reasons.

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what did the brick say to the other brick? hello. the guy next to the bricks was shocked and went home and killed his wife then later higherd an indian man to give him a lapdance.

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Two little boys are talking to each other: - My dad's dick is soo biig! - Eh, my dad's dick is small but it still hurts...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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