WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

how do you kill a bird? tie it to a tree throw a wasp nest at it and run the tree over with a semi filled with manure

Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

What's the difference between a Lamborgini and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Lambo in my garage.

What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

Why did humpty dumpty have a great fall? He was committing suicide.

How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

Lambos are red Tuxedos are Blue The cat is out of the bag Shit, we're all gonna die in helll

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? most likely one unless there is physical disability that makes this person incapable of this action

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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