A baby seal walks into a bar... The bartender looks at it and says: too young.

The last joke I tried to submit used "trolololol" as the enter code thing and I spelled it without the extra "lol" The lolz have got me again *this time it asked me for "basket case"

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

Wanna hear a joke? Ruddell had sex.

What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

your momma's so ugly that she currently deals with an overwhelmingly self consciousness view of her appearance to the point where she has contemplated suicide and it is in your best interest to seek her medical help in order to preserve her heath and overall well being.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, he died.

why did the chicken cross the road? does a chicken have to explain everything it does?? do u explain to everyone around you why you're crossing the road every time?! i think not!

Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

if it walks like a duck and looks like a duck your probably looking at a goose

Did you hear about the Polish couple taking selfies while on vacation in Portugal? They fell off a cliff and died in front of their children. True story.

What kind of toy do you give to a dead baby? A death rattle.

What is worse than ending and apple joke in the holocaust? Getting raped by a goat

What did the penis say to the vagina? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

Whats the difference between Rolf Harris and a pedophile Whoops I didn't quite think this one through

what's the difference between a chicken and a grape? They're both purple........ except for the chicken

Whats black, white, and red all over? a dead panda.

The chicks at the bar last night were do hot. The girls weren't half bad either

What did the deaf guy get for Christmas? An iTunes gift card

id give my right arm to be ambidextrous

There were two chippendales in a bar - what were their nicknames? Chip and Dale

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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