Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

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So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

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5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

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How long does it take you to count to 5? 5 seconds.

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CHAD'S A FAG!!!

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she couldn't get a high paying job and had to settle for working full time at McDonalds, just to get your family through the week.

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Why did Kristi drop her chap-stick? Kristi was of the many children held in hostage of the Jewish heritage during the times of Hitler's wrath. At the Concentration camps they were not given the opportunity to maintain a healthy, average diet thus decreasing her body strength. No longer could Kristi hold her chap-stick - alas her frail little fingers slowly released the cylinder shaped tube and hopelessly watched it hit the ground. As it hit the ground, a cloud of dust swept over Kristi's body. At the same time Kristi was taking a big whiff of fresh air (just kidding, the air at concentration camps were not fresh - it reeked of acid) she accidentally inhaled the dirt which fled through her body and made her faint. She woke up and it was a dream, lol.

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

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Q. why did the skeleton crosse the rood. A. he didin`t becas he had no guts

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What ended in the year 1970? 1969

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What did the homosexual give in his secret box? important papers from work.

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

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What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

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Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops