After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

What do u do when u hear about a smart Blonde. Cant think of anything? Exactly

What is square and grey? A grey square.

Why did the old lady cross the road? Why not.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

Nerochan, it was really nice chatting with you, I hope we can chat some other time... Please tell me why you are upset with me, just pick up the phone, I mean let me know what I did you wrong.

Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

whats worse than killing someone? finding out your mom is your dad

Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he wanted to impress his wife.

make me a sandwich! what kind?

What is you problem!? Im retarded, what is your problem?

why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge. Why did Sally fall off her bike? She was hit by a falling monkey and fridge.

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

G

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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