Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ?... because he was dead

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What did the guy say to helen keller nothing... according to helen keller

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Your mom's so fat, I tried to rape her but couldn't find her p**** and gave up. Instead I decided to take her out to dinner. We enjoyed a lovely meal and I spent the rest of the night trimming her fat with a vegetable peeler while she screamed and bled all over the floor.

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Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

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Rejected Disney titles: - 1,000,000,001 Dalmatians: The Need of Neutering - Beauty and the Bricks - Zambi: the Walking Deer - The Iron King 2: Simba's Ferride - The Little Mormon - Cinderella 4: The Fairy Godfather and his Mafia - Tarzipan of the Choco-Apes - Brother Boar - Home on Deranged - The Emperor's New Sith Apprentice - Mickey and the Mousetrap - Lilo and B**ch

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What do you do when a dog chews your pen? Use a pencile instead.

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Q: What do you call a black woman who can't tell you who her baby daddy is? A: "Mam". Rape is a serious and painful crime, and the strength to raise a child on her own without her consent is worthy of respect.

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Whta's the difrence betwen a goat and a hors? The goat goed too eet the hors thre day ago!

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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What's round and cheesy? A cheese wheel.

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There is a dead guy on the road lying in a puddle of blood with a gunshot wound on his head. What happened? He died

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How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

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Why did the chair fall off the cliff? Well it is an inamitate object so it did not move itself, someone must have threw it

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Send her to her room until she becomes civil enough to explain what was causing her misbehavior.

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I AM YOUR SALVATION! And you are my poopstain

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A man walks into a bar Ouch

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What is six foot three, plays basketball, and is black? A black dog with basketball skills and takes steroids.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, 32!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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