What did the priest say to the little boy? "Reading antijokes in rapid succession takes almost all humor from them."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You want to know how I got these scars? A horrible knife throwing accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why can't Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's green, [ THIS BIG ] and flies around the room... A remote controlled gherkin!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what did joe eat for breakfast? he didn't eat, joe is schizophrenic steve's best friend

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between a nutcracker and a can of tomato soup? Oh... I don't know, I was asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

your dad called night and told me your grandpa died.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

seek beauty

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: Why does it snow in Canada and not in Mexico? A: Because Canada is far from the equator and Mexico isn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

thumb_up thumb_down -9

yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than breastfeeding a wolverine? Force-breastfeeding a wolverine.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops