A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What is you problem!? Im retarded, what is your problem?

No soup for you!

A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

What does a blonde's pussy taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage.

Three men are sitting in a tub. One of them says "Toss me the soap." The second one says "Toss me the shampoo." The third one says "Toss me the toaster."

What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

In Soviet Russia my freedoms are severally restricted by communism.

Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

What did the taxi friver say to the man? "You forgot your briefcase"

What did the boy reading the book do? He kept turning pages and reading until he came to the end, closed the book, and put it back onto the book shelf.

How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because it died

Mogok Papiti.

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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