A: Knock Knock. B:Whose there? A:Jehovah witness!

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Patient- "Doctor, doctor help me! I've only got 59 seconds to live!" Doctor- "I'll be there in a minute."

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Alien vs. Predator = Evil Staplers vs. Evil Jamaicans

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Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

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It's raining it's poring the old man died die to a sudden increase in blood pressure thus leading to a heart attack

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Roses are red Violets are blue Lemons are yellow

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Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

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You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

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Why did the 18 year old girl take her clothes off? To take a shower

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Thank you, you remind me that I am not insane, just because I believe we humans can accomplish more, by uniting as one, rather than fighting one another. I feel as if I belong somewhere else, yet the question remains always, are people such as you better, or are we relics from the past?

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Your mom is over the average weight for a person of here height and age.

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whats white and if it fell from a tree it would kill you ? Pat Butcher

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Q: What do a dead cat and a flower have in common. A: Nothing, just go away.

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved

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What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

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What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

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What's blue and white and can't climb a tree? A fridge in a denim jacket!

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why did the black man rape the little girl? no reason, its just a part of life. oh well

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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What's the best use for a van full of candy? Donating it to an orphanage.

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Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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