What did the speech impaired man say ? Nothing.

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Steve Jobs is alive In our Hearts <3

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What do you call a man who shoots someone? A very bad person.

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What did the young child with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

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When Gronkowski spikes the ball, 20 children die.

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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Why did Chuck Norris fall of the cliff? Because he was pushed.

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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What did the dwarf do after he sore a mole? Nothing. dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist.

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how did the family die? They were shot in the head.

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knock knock There's no door

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What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

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"knock knock" "whos there?" "pizza delivery!"

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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Why was the woman sad on her 21st birthday? Because she was born on September 11,1980

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The dewey decimal system

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What did the white man say to the black man that sneezed? -Bless you.

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There was once a guy who was so crazy...he was sectioned.

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How can you tell if someone is a virgin? Everyone is a virgin in something. For example, if you never had sex with a dinosaur, then you are a virgin at dinosaur sex.

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Roses are Red Violets are Red Grass is Red Trees are Red My yard is on fire.

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What did jonah say to your mum ... Nothing jonah is your mum

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Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas ....... An ashtray

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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