What did little Timmy get for Christmas? Abandoned

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what do u call a Muslim flying a plane??? 9-11

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Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

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If you are riding uphill in a canoe and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to fit in the dog house? None. Ice cream has no bones.

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On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

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your mom is so fat that when she walks in America with a yellow coat as they get a taxi

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A man died. What was his name? Phil. His name was Phil.

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What has seven ears, four legs and two arms? Nothing.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

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How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CAsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fhomepage.eircom.net%2F~cronews%2Felep%2Felep.html&ei=1aAjVMrJJcePoQS99ILADg&usg=AFQjCNEy4qvnhug3LTGYLGylpoRhxjk_zg

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What makes you hate life and feel good at the same time? A rapist.

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

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Jake: When was war of 1812? Harry: 1812 Jake: Oh.

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I see London, I see France... I see a Map.

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69

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Roses are red Violets are blue Just smoked some Meth nelnfjknfkjnwkejnkjnwefkjnKJNFKJRNFKWNEFEJNFJNWKEJNWFKEJFN

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Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

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SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

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If John has 50 candybars and eats 45 of them how many does he have left? Diabetes.

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i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

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just in time?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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